Soda and chips
By JR Owens
My Father in the mid-1950s. He was a man’s man of his time. By today’s standards he would be known as abusive and mean, but to me, he was just my Dad. (From personal photos)
My Dad rapped on the car window and I rolled it down with the hand crank, then he handed me a bag of potato chips and an orange-flavored soda. He assured me he would be out in a few minutes, but I knew it could be hours – depending on how the poker game went. That’s how things were then, in a small Midwestern town. You didn’t take your kids into taverns, especially in the neighborhood I grew up in.
Every now and then, when there would be no one else to care for me at night, my father would take me to the Derby Inn Tavern. Sometimes he would take me in the tavern and order a bottle of soda for me and let me hang around a while as he drank beer and talked with friends. Much of the time, however, he would leave me in the car in the parking lot outside. The men inside were playing poker, drinking, and many times a fight would break out, and my father was usually at the center of the fracas. “It’s no place for kids,” he would say.
I remember one evening with the orange soda and chips in the car vividly. Only bits and pieces of that night have stayed with me, but I remember how I felt. I remember a misty rain and droplets on the windshield. I remember the air was getting cooler and holding the bottle of soda only made my hands colder. What I do not recall is how the evening ended. Most likely it ended with him stumbling out of the tavern in a drunken state and driving us home. If he came out a winner he would be in a good mood and talkative, even happy and generous. He would have given me a hand full of change, and maybe a couple dollar bills.
If he came out a loser, or got into a fight he would come out angry and drive the car too fast and scare me. I would never say a word or make a sound; I wanted not to be noticed, for being noticed would put me in danger of being struck in the face. Either way, if he won or lost, after we got home he would pass out on the floor or the couch in the living room and I would disappear into my room thankful the night had ended.
This is how things were around 1957. People, times and attitudes toward children were different then. I didn’t realize I had a bad childhood because when it’s all you know, you have nothing to make comparisons with. This was my life at the time, and other children I knew had it pretty much the same way. Looking back at my childhood years later I realize I probably had it tougher than most, but I didn’t know it at the time. Reality is what you know and nothing else matters. You make the best of what you have and keep on moving forward.
I look at children today and compare them to myself at their age. They seem less restless than me, but they also seem to be less interested in the world around them. Children today have a different kind of imagination than we had because technology has given them new avenues to use. We created our own avenues with what little we had. We spent a lot of time outside playing and occasionally, in the evenings, may sit in front of a television for an hour or two. The games we played involved active participation and interaction with other human beings. Video games didn’t exist. Most of all, we were not angry. Had we been able to look ahead a few decades we might have been angry, but that was not possible. I often wonder where the kids today get their anger. A swat on the seat or even a slap in the face didn’t make me angry as a child, it only made me fearful and respectful. We knew we had to please to be pleased.
Where will today’s protected children receive what they need to wrestle with life in the future? This is a cliche, but there is a truth to the saying that what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. Where will today’s children draw their strength from? So many seem to be like empty vessels, floating through life looking for someone to blame for what they cannot possibly feel or understand in the first place.
Their is violence in the homes, streets and schools today, a kind of violence that was not present when I grew up. I fear for today’s children because I don’t believe they have the tools to deal with harsh times and the consequences of life. While at the same time, I am thankful for the times I grew up in and for the soda and chips.
The selling of a war
By JR Owens
At the top of a news page this morning, I find a photo of two Syrian children with the headline “Syrian Families Brave Bullets, dash for safety.” When is the last time we held any concern for Syria? What I see in this headline is another corporate propaganda machine trying to sell us a new war. No weapons of mass destruction here, just poor little children who need our help. Bullshit!
Why don’t they show us pictures of poor starving abused children right here in our own country? Answer: because we are not suppose to feel sorry for the poor, neglected and abused in our own country. Here, the needy are just lazy welfare types who have brought the country to financial ruin. (LMAO) We have fought in Iraq and Afghanistan for more than ten years now, so the Military Industrial Complex needs another war. (They have bombs to make) Fuck them! Let one of the other Middle Eastern countries help Syria. I don’t see us sticking our noses in the problems in Mexico or Honduras and they are a lot closer. Let the Middle East take care of the Middle East. It’s time for America to take care of its own.
IGNORE THE NEWS BECAUSE IT”S NOT NEWS. It’s understood that most Americans don’t trust or listen to politicians any longer. So, a handful of wealthy people have bought all the news outlets. Ah, now they have a better way to spread the BS, through the trusted news media. God help us! The press is suppose to protect us from tyranny not be their mouthpiece.
Do you know where your guns are?
By JR Owens
The Second Amendment to the US Constitution that gives us the right to own firearms will take a lot of criticism over the months ahead. Assault weapons will be the chief focus of gun legislation because assault weapons are being misused, as in the case in Connecticut this past week. The conversation against assault weapons – dare we call them weapons of mass destruction – should also open up discussion about mental illness, parenting, security at schools what we can do to slow the violence on our streets, and particularly in our schools. Our children should have the right to be educated without the fear of persecution.
When I see the faces of the children who were shot to death by an apparent mentally disturbed young man I am saddened by this senseless loss of life. Unfortunately, I’m not shocked by these kinds of incidences any longer because they happen more frequently each year; I’m just waiting for the next shoe to drop. The very fact that violence, especially in our schools and around children has become commonplace is unacceptable.
I have never owned any firearm other than a 9 mm. pistol, and I had that for home defense and target shooting at a local shooting range. As many of us did, I grew up around guns. My father carried a pistol, my grandfather and uncles were hunters. A gun cabinet in the corner of the living room was not an unusual sight growing up. I can recall a shotgun hanging on a rack just above one of my uncle’s bed. Rifles, shotguns, pistols and ammunition for these weapons were everywhere. Guns were easier to obtain in those days, but I do not recall anyone going into a school a killing children. Our elders taught us to respect guns, and most of all; they taught us to respect them. So, when my grandfather or other male family member told me not to touch the gun, I didn’t touch the gun. I didn’t ask why, I just didn’t cross that line.
As a young boy my grandfather took me hunting. I watched as he shot rabbits and squirrels; I knew what guns could do and I was taught how to carry, shoot, clean and use a rifle and shotgun. Firearms were all around me but the thought of touching one of them without someone there to supervise me never entered my mind.
I have always been a gun advocate and I still advocate responsible gun ownership. However, when I look at tragedies involving mass killings by crazy people, it gives me pause to think and reflect about the issue. It is said that guns don’t kill people, people kill people. It’s also said that when guns become criminal, only criminals will own guns. While there is some truth to both statements, neither are good arguments to keep guns on the streets.
Outside of historic reasons, my gun advocacy comes from issues of trust. I don’t believe law enforcement can stop some strung-out meth freak from killing me if he wants my wallet. Even more, I don’t trust law enforcement well enough to allow them to be the only people who can have a firearm. I don’t trust our government, no matter what political party is in charge, I don’t fully trust them not to trample on my liberties as an American. I believe these are the same reason others stubbornly refuse to give up their guns; it’s all about trust.
The question is, do we allow our right to protect ourselves stand in the way of the rights of helpless six-year-olds and other innocent victims? The unselfish answer would be “no” we will not, but that’s not the answer we are going to give you because there is no issue that steps in front of self preservation.
We have come to a point in our history as human beings where self preservation is more important than anything. This mindset is part of our everyday life. We will protect our personal liberties at any cost. This protectionist attitude goes beyond our personal safety; however, it also includes our property and our ideals. If you’re wealthy you will trample upon anyone who attempts to take away your wealth. If you are a CEO of a corporation you will do anything to keep profits growing. If you are a television producer you will do anything to keep ratings high. On the whole, we believe in personal responsibility, fiscal responsibility and that people should earn what they have. Yet, at the same time, we have no problem stepping over someone else to get where we are going, wherever that may be.
The problem is not firearm ownership, no; it is much bigger than that. The problem we face today is ourselves. The problem we face today is poor parenting, inadequate treatment and placement for the mentally ill and disregard for the quality of human life.
The mother of this young man who slaughtered the children and educators at the school in Connecticut collected guns, and that collection happen to include assault rifles. While I defend her right to bear arms, I cannot defend her apparent disregard for being a responsible parent. She obviously did not teach her child what my grandfather and uncles taught me, respect. She presumably didn’t seek, or could not obtain help for her obviously troubled child, or maybe she just wasn’t paying attention. People don’t walk into a grade school and slaughter children unless there is something very wrong with them. How could the parent of this person not know this?
It’s obvious to me the blame for this particular incident rides on the back of poor parenting and a society that doesn’t believe, or doesn’t want to pay for, a troubled young person who needed care. It’s also obvious to me, that if he did receive care, it wasn’t working and someone should have noticed that.
Our society has come far too accustomed to violence. Our society has become far too selfish with its resources and our society does not teach right and wrong with the same vigor it teaches issues of less importance. If guns are the problem, we are responsible for the problem.
I do not want to see the right of gun ownership taken away. The Second Amendment is like the First Amendment that gives me the right to say what I think. Our right to free speech is protected and many things are said and done under that protection that hurt others. Yet at the same time, we understand that if that right in infringed upon we lose our ability to debate. Some negative issues will always arise from a positive one; in gaining ground in one area we will give ground in another area. Nevertheless, I must support a ban on assault weapons because I see no need for them for personal protection, target practice or hunting. Although I support the Second Amendment I understand that a little may need to be given up for the greater good. We simply have no need for assault rifles in our homes. Assault rifles were made for warfare. We are not at war with ourselves are we?
What to do about those lazy poor people
By JR Owens
Remember the old television shows or movies that depicted an overweight factory owner with a chain tangling from a gold watch in his pocket warding off begging children in the street? Maybe you recall a well-dressed lady getting out of a carriage on a muddy street corner handing out pennies to begging children? This type of scene made for a good story line in Hollywood films, but it was a sight seldom seen otherwise. God bless us all!
This scenario rarely happened then and it rarely happens now. Perhaps, it never happens now because people who have, don’t really care about people who don’t have. To care, to really care, one would have to feel a little guilty for having more than most, and that would also be very rare. That’s not to say philanthropy does not exist today, it does, but it is still a rare commodity.
Why should the wealthy feel guilty for what they have? They shouldn’t feel guilty, but they should feel empathy and a sense of obligation towards others. They should feel this obligation because many of them have what they have, not due to hard work, but to circumstance. While most have worked for what they have in some form or another, what they do is a pale comparison to what the poor have to do just to survive from day-today. The working poor perform back-breaking work, endure long hours and receive inadequate pay for their labor. Some sociologists would call this the division of labor, but I think of it more as a cast system. If you are born to a poor working-class family your chances of becoming more have gotten increasingly difficult, and this trend will likely continue.
The only thing that has kept us from being engulfed in actual class warfare is the middle class; they stand between those who have and those who have not. The middle class are a buffer zone separating the very rich from the very poor. As long as the poverty stricken in this country can look to the middle class for direction they have hope, hope they too can rise from poverty and find a better standard of living. This is why the “middle-class” has become such a political talking point. Politicians realize the middle-class are what stands between themselves and being lynched in an uprising of the needy.
It’s estimated that more than 500,000 veterans are homeless, along with a million and a half children in this country. Everyone would agree this is tragic and unacceptable in a country that is so rich in resources, yet nothing is being done about it. Nothing is being done because the middle-class have been convinced, for the most part, that the poor live the way they do because it is what they choose due to their laziness. This idea stands in stark contrast to the facts. This idea stands as an excuse not to take action, but to keep things going as they are. Those who are doing well enough are still unhappy with what they have and blame the poor and lazy because they do not have more. They believe they are being taxed to feed, clothe and provide care for those who set around doing nothing all day. They don’t stop to think about where the largest portion of their tax dollars go; our infrastructure, national defense and things of that nature. They don’t look into the facts because they are not convenient and the truth would not set them free because it would go against their beliefs. Worst of all, the beliefs they have are handed down to them by those who profit from their ignorance.
Every middle class man and woman would agree that people should have health care, food and shelter, just as long as they don’t have to pay for it in some fashion. As long as their way of life isn’t threatened they agree. If they could wave a magic wand and feed every hungry child they would do so, sometimes that magic wand comes in the form of prayer; “put it in God’s hands.” Maybe, just maybe, God has enough to do and would like to see you take responsibility, not just for your own needs, but for the needs of others whenever you can help them. Christian values today have become convoluted with greed. The Bible is their roadmap to heaven, but they only follow the roads that suit their personal agenda and beliefs. This is called faith by some, but faith doesn’t really exist, it’s a shame. Faith is an excuse for inaction and apathy. How many hungry and homeless people do you think faith has provided for?
I honor those who give their time and resources gathering food and trying to find beds for homeless to sleep in at night. I honor those whose hearts are in the right place, but the real problem is their minds are not in the right place and they are not looking at the problem in an intelligent fashion. Intelligence help would involve something like, give someone a fish and feed them for a day, or teach them to fish so they can feed themselves. Unfortunately, we do not look that far ahead. Instead we hand the problem off to God or to politicians who pay lip service to the needy but do little to actually help.
You hear a lot today about the fiscal cliff, and eminent sounding thing that does not exist, but it strikes fear into our hearts and minds. My taxes will be raised if something isn’t done; I will have less to spend. That new car may have to be put on hold, that vacation may have to be shortened and my standard of living may be lowered. While many worry about that standard of living, others are simply concerned with existing. To avoid this non-existent cliff we are about to go off, we must do something. So what is the first thing some of us look at; cutting programs that help the less fortunate? Ideas come through like raising the age older people can go on Medicare from 65 to 67, raising the age people may retire, cutting food stamps, shortening unemployment benefits and providing less healthcare. How is it better to take from those have little in the first place than to take from those who have more than enough?
Meanwhile, back at a middleclass family dinner table they are convinced the conservatives in Washington have the right formula. The spending has to stop. Wrong! The spending needs to increase for those who have no food, no shelter and no health care. What needs to be done? Rather than spend less, take in more from those who can afford it. It’s a simple equation that always works. As we spend more, more of the helpless become self-sufficient. When we spend to educate and build we are not wasting money, we are securing a future for real people. If we have to feed and house the poor before we educate and train them, it is money well spent, and I dare say your precious standard of living will hardly be affected.
We’ve probably all read stories about people who have ATM machines installed in their homes so they don’t’ have to go out to get cash, or who have toilets made of gold installed in the bathrooms. Stories of this kind of extravagance are littered on the Internet and on television shows, yet we accept it. We shake our heads and laugh to ourselves when we should be asking ourselves why. If you have that much money, you have too much money. If you live that way, you live too lavishly. Shit stints in a golden toilet the same as a porcelain one, but I might agree there’s a better color match.
The poor will always be among us, but that doesn’t mean we should simply look the other way. The rich will always be among us, but that doesn’t mean we should be amused by their wasteful antics. Those who stand to gain from keeping the poor where they are promise they won’t touch your money, but it’s foolish to believe that. Do you really think when they have taken every entitlement off the table and everything from the poor they won’t come after you next? To some, there is no such thing as too much. They want it all, and even if they take it all they will not be happy. There is no happiness in the heart of someone who is so selfish.
When I had more myself I often handed out money to people on the street. I have given people holding signs that read, “I’m homeless” or “I’m hungry” a few extra dollars. I’ve been approached in parking decks and given money to men with tired looking eyes and ragged clothes, and I never regretted it or missed the money. I would spend that money one way or another on some thing or another, so why not give it to someone who really needed it? A family member once told me I should not give money to “those people”, they might use it to buy drugs. To that I replied, “It’s none of my business what they do with it after I give it away to them.” Certainly, I would hope they would go buy a hamburger rather than a bottle of cheap wine with the money I gave to them, but the spirit of giving is not a means of control.
Today some want food stamp recipients to take drug tests before receiving help, and this is another trend I see expanding in the future. My question is, isn’t a drug user a human being, and doesn’t a drug user need to eat just the same as someone who doesn’t use drugs? If we are going to put conditions on basic needs, why don’t we just drug test everyone and shoot them in the head and be done with it. This would assure us no one would be taking advantage of us. Maybe, I should have followed that man I gave money to in that parking garage, and maybe, if I found him coming out of a liquor store I should have beat the crap out of him for using my money unwisely.
It’s easy to pick on the poor when they have no voice and have no one to turn to who will listen. It’s easy to judge others when you do not walk in their shoes, or live in a cardboard box under a bridge. It’s easy to cast a vote for the person who claims he will protect your interests when your interests are protecting only yourself. It’s easy, and we like it when it’s easy, but isn’t that a form of laziness too?
There are only two avenues we can travel concerning what to do with the poor, we can either help them, or we can rid ourselves of the problem and kill them. But just remember, when you take away the bottom layer of the food chain, it might expose you as the new bottom layer.
